I have decided that I will no longer refer to the man I married as my husband. From now on, he will be referred to as my life partner. I have made this decision in support of my gay and lesbian friends who cannot legally call their partners their husbands or wives, yet those people deserve no lesser title.
We are so hung up on titles and labels and the definitions of one thing or another. We want to be able to categorize each other into neat little boxes. We forget that people are complicated. Life is complicated. Let’s just decide to make this one thing less complicated. What is a husband or a wife but a partner in all things? If we have made a committment to someone and invited them in to every part of our lives, does their gender truly matter?
Maybe if we change the label we can change the law. If we allow the words “life partner” to mean the same thing as “husband” or “wife”, we take the power away from the words, lessening their meaning, and enabling people to feel less defensive toward them.
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