Throughout this pregnancy I have been terrified that I would have a girl. Despite the remarkable advances made in the 20th Century, this is still very much a man’s world. I’m reminded of that every time I pull into the parking lot of my company and see the men’s cars, more expensive and more kept up than the women’s because they are paid 30% more on average, even though they do a hell of a lot less work than I do. I’m reminded of that when I look at photos of the United States Congress, The United States Senate, the United States Supreme Court, and the Presidential Cabinet (though huge props to Obama for moving us a little further along). I’m reminded of that when there is a gathering of the heads of major universities and major corporations. I’m reminded of it when I look at my health care plan and see that there is 80% maternity coverage, no birth control coverage, and no coverage for pap smears and mammograms.
I see the way women are still treated in today’s society, still objectified, still ignored. I see “women’s professions” being considered less important, women’s sports being covered less, women’s issues being glossed over in the media, and women’s bodies being legislated. I hear young women talking about the way they should behave in relationships – how to bite their tongues when their partner is angry, how to dress to please a man, how to cook to please a man, and how to clean to keep their partner’s happy. I see little girls wearing clothes tat are too old for them because they’ve learned early that the sexier they dress, the sexier they dance, the more a boy will like them. I see women putting on themselves the majority of the housework and the majority of the childcare because they can’t rely on their partners to help them.
Having a girl makes me nervous. I can only hope that her chances of being truly equal improve as she grows.
I feel that she may have it better than your generation did, in fact, I’m sure she will. There is plenty of a way to go yet but by the time she is out there (around 2029) she’ll be battling on a more level playing field.
Keep us posted.
It is a man’s world, as you say, but I have a girl and empower her in the most majestic of ways. I delight in seeing her grow.
That’s exactly why I think gender should be irrelevant to a mother. I have a Korean friend who told me that determining the gender of a baby is actually illegal because boys are so preferred culturally. If a parent has trouble seeing beyond male and female, how do we expect a society to do the same?
Congratulations on your pregnancy! You will have a very lucky daughter.
Oh pooh – don’t be silly. Raise her just as you would raise a boy: Don’t be gender specific. She will make her own way in the world as long as she has you as a role model. You are strong, intelligent, and forthright. Make sure she understands that women are not objects, don’t introduce her to Barbie dolls, and you’ll be fine.
Agreed with Saur.
10 years from now, being a girl will be a benefit and you’d be glad she was born a girl and not a boy. Look at any university. They’re all women. today’s boys are depressed, doped up on ritalin, and listening to emo music.
Proven fact – people who go to college on average make considerably more than people who don’t. I guarantee you next generation, you will see men complaining that if only they can make as much money as women. There will be a woman President in our lifetime and it may even be YOUR daughter.
Thanks for your support, everyone. I think my feelings on this matter probably have more to do with m pending divorce and the terrifiying prospect of having to raise a girl on my own than anything else.
Good to hear. Well, not good to hear that you’re getting divorced, but good to hear that that’s why you’re worried.
I actually think in ten years, you’ll be better off being a girl than a boy.
Today – you’re better off being a boy, but it’s changing very, very fast.
A shameless plug of sorts…
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